Saturday, 6 September 2008


One of those "A funny thing happened to me on the way to the gig" tales now...

I was on the train heading to Green Lane station in birkenhead to attend the Diamanthian/Neuroma gig at Hotel California and 3 lads tried to rob me with the old "Let's keep my hand held up in my pocket like I've got a knife" routine.
I heard "Giz ya money or I'll cut ya" so I turned around and stood up and they started to circle me like the fucking scumbags they are, I just thought if I die or get fucked tonight then these 3 cunts are coming to hell with me, so I went for the first punch right in the first face my arm could reach, busted his nose up good and he went flying to the ground, it was weird though cos they're supposed to have a knife but he took his hands out of his pocket to "Push" me, yeah you read that right Push me, not punch me or even give me a slap or a kick, so I lamped him in the face and got the other one by the scruff of his neck and threw him out the way to the floor because the first lad was just about to get up with his bloodied face and he was rooting around his pockets for something so I said "no you fucking dont" and booted him down again right in his side. It was very clear that these lads were doing this for the first time and it was obvious the were absolutely shitting themselves.
We came to a stop and I don't even know were we were, it all happened so fast, and keep in mind the train was pretty full of disgusted people not helping me or so I thought, the other 2 lads ran off the train and then police came out of nowhere, apparently they were in the drivers bit and someone alerted them so somebody did help me out a bit there, it turned out good in the end, all them witnesses there to say I was the victim, pity the lad was on the floor having really bad trouble breathing.
We got off at Green Lane station but obviously in no mood to watch any gig, the police sorted an ambulance out for him and gave me a lift home after I'd been to the police station to get a statement sorted out.

Got a call off the police today to update me that they think they've got the other 2 lads, the police say they were caught running away from other policemen just outside of the station where they got off, the police have been watching the recording off the cctv which apparently showed the whole thing so thank fuck for that, they told me that the injured lad has a broken nose, a broken rib and a punctured lung from that kick I gave him. I've got to go back to the police station to view that video on monday and go to an ID parade where I get to see if it is them two, I certainly won't forget what they look like.
If you get on any form of mass public transport in liverpool, you can always guarantee something will ruin your day.
It hasn't put me off getting on trains but I'll be fucking ready next time.

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